Blog Archive from MySpace

Blog Archive

Why is this Here?
I just thought I’d let you know what this is doing here.  I cut and pasted all the blog entries I had on MySpace (http://www.myspace.com/jasonamurray) and put them here so you wouldn’t have to go back to that site.  Below is my first blog entry ever!  And they progress chronologically down the document, all the way to the very last blog entry I ever wrote on MySpace, if you don’t count the pointer entry to http://www.slowestbuffalo.blogspot.com/ which is where you’re probably at now.  Enjoy.

Guess what's at the top of Cleeve Hill?
Current mood: accomplished
Okay, decided to try to start putting into words my experiences over here in the UK.  First off, I'll be here at least 6 months so I have plenty of time to get it right.  Second, I'm trying (again) to qualify for Boston so I have plenty of miles I can use to explore the area on foot.  Third, when my feet fail, I've got a car so I can go even further, like to Scotland!

Anyway, Cleeve hill is this monster of a hill (7% grade or so, for about 2 miles) that sits to the northwest of Cheltenham (where I now live).  At the very top of this hill (technically a mountain after someone dumped another 15 feet of dirt at the top to hit 1000 feet) is, of all things, a golf course. 

Right in the middle of rocky hills, steep descents, neon painted sheep (and their, um, droppings), and craters, is a 18-hole golf course.  18 holes where anyone in their right mind wouldn't even think of putting one; I guess this is what they mean by Scottish golf.  At least, this is what I imagine they mean.  The place was quite popular Saturday morning, both for me as a runner, others as a place to walk their dogs, and even the 30 or so golfers I saw getting ready to tee it up.

One of these days maybe I'll have to rent some gear and sign up for some tee time.  I'll let you know how that goes.

What is a Balloon Festival?
Current mood: calm
It's not a place where you suck on helium balloons and talk funny.  It's not a place where you go for a ride in a hot air balloon.  It's really just a place where you watch a few hot air balloons launch and then spend your money on rides and food. 

But, in spite of the tame atmosphere it was quite interesting to listen to the interviews of amateur balloonists and watch them ply their hobby.  They came in 4x4's with trailers, out of which came 2 or 3 people, a large ballon, tanks of fuel, the tell-tale wicker baskets, and a powerful fan.  What's the fan for?  Well, it's used, once the balloon is laid out on it's side, to start filling it with air, prior to using the tanks and fire. 

Once these things are laid out it it wasn't long before they were in the air.  I was surprised on how quickly they launched.  From the car pulling up to getting the balloon off the ground couldn't have been more than 20 minutes.  That's amazing. 

There were some with advertisements, some plain, but all of them launched without a problem.  Once in the air they sailed off to the southeast, up and over a ridge, to disappear.  Apparently the process is to then land somewhere, get picked up by your 4x4 and trailer, and head back to the fairground to do it again.  I didn't stick around for the evening launch and fireworks and music, though.  I was just too tired from my morning run. 

All in all, I wish I could've gone for a ride in one, but just seeing them take to the air was enough for one day.  I got some nice pics, too.

My Birthday in London
Category: Life
Well, for the past 4 or 5 years, I've been celebrating my birthday alongside Derek, a friend who shares the same birthday as I do (August 26th), so when I found out he was going to be attending London Business School in the fall and would miss our birthday, I was not pleased.  Until I found out a week before my birthday that I'd be moving to England, too!  Strange how things work out.

Unfortunately I had to work on my birthday, but was still able to catch the train from Cheltenham to London and arrive at the station around 9PM.  I met up with Derek and his wife Kelly at their hotel (they hadn't moved into their flat yet) where we shared some (strong) birthday libations before heading to Burger King to stock up on some grub.  Kelly claims the meat tastes different here, but I think that's just because the Brits don't believe in salt and other spices. 

After we grabbed some food, we went to some Irish bar feeling quite buzzed and quite sated.  Cover charges in London, for those locations that want to stay open later than 11PM, are outrageous.  The cover for the Irish bar, which does nothing other than get you in the door, no free drink or nothing, was 8 pounds.  Mine, however, was free b/c it was my birthday.  Derek's would have been free, too, had he brought his ID.  Try as we might he still had to pay.  Luckily for us we barely had to buy any drinks the whole night through.  Between the 'gay' blokes, the Aussies, the 'pod people,' and the Italian women, we were getting free drinks left and right.

We'll start with the 'gay' blokes.  Of these guys only one really seemed gay, and that's just b/c Derek has the insane ability to attract gay or gay-type men.  Man this guy was a close talker.  In reality none of the guys were gay but that guy sure did hang all over Derek.  Regardless, they were the first to buy us drinks, lots of them.

After that this Aussie guy who looked like a rock star and his friend (not girlfriend), Liesel, bought us a round.  They were cool.  It's always nice to party with Aussies; they have such a skewed sense of the world.  You'd swear they'd be laid back in the middle of a downtown firefight.

The 'pod people' didn't actually buy us any drinks, but Derek had fun dancing with them, so I thought I'd mention it.  They were dancing on the dancefloor (how odd to find people dancing there, you might say) with their shirts pulled up over their head like Beavis from the 'Cornholio' episode.  So Derek joined in.  We have some great photos of this.

Finally, the Italians.  I mention them b/c I really wanted a smoke that night and got one by 'buying' it with one of our many free drinks.  We had so many free drinks we couldn't even drink them all.  They were nice.  It was a couple and this other, overweight girl.  Eventually the couple left her to go make out somewhere so we kept her company.  Strange thing is, at the end of the night, after we left the bar she says to me, "Can I go now?"  Not knowing what she means I'm like, "Yes, you are dismissed."  Weird.  Noone has ever really asked me permission to leave a bar like that.

Well, after the bar closed around 3AM or something, we stumbled to the bus.  On the way I burnt my mouth on a quite-hot sausage, but I didn't mind because I was so hungry (or so drunk.  or both).  We got back to the hotel and I proceded to fall asleep on the floor amid the comforters, after making the last of my drunken phone calls from my cell.  Man, calling the states on a cell phone is expensive.  Lesson learned.  What a great birthday.

Brief Visit to Stone Henge and Bath
Living in Cheltenham, there are many 'quick visits' that are possible.  Two of which are Stone Henge, located near Amesbury in Wiltshire, and Bath, located near, well Bath.  Both are nearby, and both are conducive to a quick visit, though I will start by saying that there is enough other attractions near both that you may want to schedule at least a day each, rather than the one day that we did it in.  Finding both was quite simple. 

Approaching Stonehenge (from the east, I belive) was really quite surreal, sort of like the feeling I still get driving around Washington D.C. and seeing the Washington Monument, Lincoln Memorial, and other such historic sites.  To see this huge setup of stones away in the distance, dwarfing everything around it, was awesome.  I'll leave out the history of the site, and all those technical details, in an effort to save some time, and simply say that you should take the free audio tour.  Unlike other audio tours, this one was short and to the point, with the option of delving deeper into the information should you so choose.  Other things you may want to see in the area include some old encampments, crop circles and burial mounds, and even a wood henge.  Make a day of it and have some fun.

Bath, home to many old Roman spring baths, was quite beautiful.  I can't go into too much detail, since we only spent a few hours there, but I can recommend touring the Roman ruins.  Take the free audio tour as well, but I will warn you that I ditched it after a few exhibits due to it's length and information overload.  I just settled in with reading the plaques and enjoying the sites.  There were also plenty of cool shops and nice places to relax, including the gardens along the river, and some nice pubs.  This is why I'd recommend a day, or even two, to visit bath; I think it'd be great to stay the night there so you can fully take in the shops, pubs, and night-life alongside the history. 

Both are locations I plan on returning to, but even with each short visit I was able to take in enough and see enough to satisfy my desire to 'see some history.' Pack a lunch and a blanket, maybe some wine, and head south of Cheltenham to see and experience Stone Henge and Bath.
Comparisons for Charlie
Category: Movies and Television
Quite some time ago I saw "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory", starring Gene Wilder.  More recently I went to see "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory", starring Johnny Depp.  Even more recent than that I completed Roald Dahl's book of the same name (no, not "Johnny Depp").  All were quite good in their own way, and I read the book primarly to see how the movies compared.

First off, see the movies; they're both quite good.  And read the book; it was, too.  All get 2 thumbs up from me.  Second, "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" was a much more accurate representation of the book, though even it took some liberties.  Johnny Depp was a bit more oddly eccentric than Willy Wonka seemed to be in the book; I'd even go so far as to say he was uncomfortable around people, and had a distaste for children.  Here, Gene Wilder seemed to play the role more accurately; Gene's Willy Wonka (I almost just left it at 'Gene's Willy') was played as though he was terribly pleased to be ablt to finally talk to people again, and loved the fact that he was with the children.  Tim Burton also did a little switching of the Golden Ticket timelines, but in a way that made it a bit more suspenseful.  Tim also maneuvered things to make Charlie much much more altruistic than he was in the book.  Though to be sure Charlie in the book was still quite a nice boy; it's just that Tim made him even moreso, whereas the original movie input a level of sin into Charlie that the book did not.  In the book each child was allowed to take two parents; in both movies, a parent was eliminated, making for a much more streamlined story.  Now, the Oompa Loompas: well, the first movie eliminated their origins, but kept true to the fact that they weren't clones.  Burton, however, made them more like clones, but truer to their origins by putting in accurate representations of the songs they sang.  Finally, missing from the book, and the original adaptation, was the whole storyline Tim Burton added in about the origin of Willy Wonka himself.  I liked this storyline, and it seemed to work quite well in bringing the entire story full circle and complete.  I'm sure there were other differences, but these are the main ones I noticed and the ones that I liked best.

All in all, I'd recommend all three tales to anyone with a few hours on their hands.  Even the book is a quick read.  Enjoy!

The Woman in Black
Category: Books, Lit, Drama
The Woman in Black, as performed at the Everyman Theatre in Cheltenham, was still a good show even with the fact that I saw it the same night as some hapless school teacher decided to take 50 to 100 young teenagers to see it.  Despite the (almost always) annoying screams of fright I still managed to enjoy myself and walk home feeling like I gained some culture.

The play is apparently a popular horror/suspense production with a unique method of presentation.  A brief synopsis: An older gentleman has written a story that he feels must be told in order to cure him and his family of their curse.  That tale is the tale of the woman in black.  He enlists the aid of a younger thespian to help him with his presentation.  The actor of course takes it upon himself to turn the simple story telling into a chilling display shore to delight the old man's 'audience.'  The old man, though initially not convinced of the necessity of this, eventually comes to enjoy his role in the retelling of the story.  However, the more they practice this presentation, the more the young actor is drawn in to the curse until, in the end, it's hard to tell fact from fiction. 

Pretty scary, right?  The kids watching sure thought so.  And, at times, so did I.  I was fully entertained from start to finish of this production, and that's a rarity for someone like myself who seems to have problems with ADD.  I strongly recommend that, if you get a chance to see this one, you go and see it.  Take a impressionable friend, too, and get some laughs with your screams. 

“Madagascar” is a kid's movie?
Category: Movies and Television
Well, I was bored on a Sunday morning and decided to catch the movie, Madagascar, which has been getting rave reviews by kids and adults alike.  This animated movie apparently revolves around 4 famous New York Zoo animal attractions that get displaced to the remote island, Madagascar, off the eastern coast of Africa.  My opinion: it wasn't good for kids OR adults.

I won't go into too many details as to why I believe this is true for the kids out there, but I will simply say that a movie for kids shouldn't use the word "sucks" or tell people to "shut up."  I know I sound like I'm some crotchety old fogey when I say that, but I guess my friend's mother and father growing up have rubbed off on me.  It's not as though those words are sooooo bad.  In fact, in today's world those words are quite tame.  It's simply the fact that saying something "sucks" or telling someone to "shut up" is just plain rude.  There are many nicer ways of expressing your feelings to someone, and kids need to learn that.  Okay, I'm stepping down off my soapbox now.  Thanks for listening.

As for why it wasn't good for adults, well I just felt it was way too scripted, and way too short.  At less than an hour and a half, it was barely long enough to fit in the plot and certainly not long enough to fit in any real characterization, which could be why it seemed so scripted.  Everything just fit too neatly into one nice little package, with no real conflict in the entire movie.  I know it's supposed to be a kids movie, and therefore conflict should be kept to a minimum, but even Shreck had conflict and, therefore, a lesson. What was the lesson in Madagascar: don't eat your friends?  Not much of a lesson if you ask me. 

Okay, maybe you could say it's about the underpinnings of true friendship; I'll give you that, but that's weak, and it's been done.  Slapping animation on some trite observation, and adding in some adult references to National Geographic and American Beauty, doesn't make for a good movie.  So I guess in then end the fact that the movie WAS so short could be a good thing.  Oh well, I'll go back to watching the Shreck franchise.

Hashing in the Cotswolds
Category: Sports
Being primarily brought up on Washington D.C. hashing, tonight's hash with the Cheltenham Gloucester (pronounced Gloster) Hash House Harriers (CGH3) was quite an experience.  I enjoyed every moment of it, right up until I had to find my way home in the dark (I'm still not fully acclimated to night driving on the wrong side of the car on the wrong side of the road).  But I survived my drive home and live to tell the tale.

I showed up after talking to the GM over email a few times and immediately led them to believe I'd be running in my business attire.  Once that was cleared up, along with the fact that they had their own female hasher sharing my name, I changed into my outfit and joined the crowd gathering outside the CheeseRollers.  The crowd was both older AND younger (lots of kids) than I'm used to, but everyone was very nice and kept me company until the start of the run (and beyond).

After a VERY short opening circle, during which I learned that there wasn't a walkers trail so much as a 'short-cutters' trail, we were off into the shiggy.  The whole trail was off-road, through farmers' lands and into wooded areas. 

I immediately noticed some differences in hashing over here, the first of which was that a 'T' is used instead of an 'X' to mark a false trail.  The 'T' actually allows you to be a bit more specific when marking a false trail, and I liked that.  They also used fewer checks than we do, presumably b/c they keep the pack together, not through the checks, but through 'regroups.' A regroup is where everyone stops on trail and waits for everyone to, well, regroup.

So there we were, climbing over fences into farmers fields, in which we were to walk around the outside edge of a 'proper' field (one in which you grow things), walking through fields with sheep (so as not to spook them), ignoring the signs that said 'Beware of Bull', and trying (and failing miserably) to avoid the many piles of cow flop (running amongst cows was quite common on this trail).  It really made me feel like a kid again.

Amidst all this we were subject to huge hills, giant holes, barbed wire fences, and geese that fancied themselves guard dogs.  On any normal day this wouldn't be so bad, but now just imagine it with the sun quickly setting and yourself without a torch.  Not so easy anymore.  But, luckily, I finished with everyone else (even after a long 'shortcut'), got changed and went inside for some beer.

Much later, probably a half hour after arriving, they 'circled up.'  Seems they only really know one song, and even that is a tame version of 'Here's to XXX they're true blue...'  Maybe I'll need to learn them a few more of the less, um, objectionable songs, so as not to upset the parents.  They didn't have any violations, though I'm told occasionally they nominate 'Sinners.' And, for the grand finale, I had to get up there as a visitor and chug an entire pint of brew (we only usually do a few ounces - I guess we're pansies in the states).  Lucky for me it was good brew, though when I was beaten by a girl (who only had to drink a half), I was still razzed off stage.  Oh well, guess I'll have to bone up on my skills.

After all that I stuck around and got to know a few of the local hashers a bit better.  I soon discovered that they, too, have those people that will talk your ear off, but they're were also alot of really nice people who wanted to get my take on their trail (which they hated) and my take on stateside hashing.  It took me over an hour to get out of the bar and head home, where I soon discovered the woes of getting broadband in your flat.  But that's a story for another day.

All in all I had a blast and plan on returning next week to see what may come of that.  Cheers.

The Terrors of BT and Virgin Broadband
Category: Blogging

I'll write more on this later (like when I have my own internet connection at the flat), but I wanted to start by saying it's been 3 weeks since I initiated a request to get Virgin internet on my BT phone line, and it's looking to be another week until I do b/c they keep stumbling over each other.

You see, first you initiate a request from Virgin to get internet on your phone line.  Then they take a week to go through the interactions with BT.  But if you initiate the request too soon after getting the phone put into your name from your landlord's, as I apparently did, BT will tell Virgin to kiss it, that there's no phone line at that location.  This all of course takes an entire week, only to come back after that time and tell you you can't get internet.  One week down.

So, once you straighten that out with BT and confirm that there's no other internet on the system and that you do indeed have a phone line, you then need to reinitiate the call with Virgin.  They then tell you it'll be another week.  Two weeks down.

Virgin then comes back to you and says that you're good to go for internet, which really only means that the internet has the CAPABILITY to be there, but ACTUALLY will take another week to be there.  Three weeks down.

Finally, you get your modem, which is a USB modem (weird), and struggle to get that installed on your laptop (more on that later), you find out (again) that BT and Virgin aren't playing well together, that there's an issue with the line, and it will be another week to get your internet connection solidified.  So here I sit, at a smokey internet cafe, preparing to wait another week.  I'll let you know how it goes.

Well, I finally got my internet, and surprisingly it didn't take the extra week.  My hats off to Virgin and BT for getting off their ass and correcting the problem.  Okay, my hat's not really off; I'm still quite upset, but very happy to be able to surf the web from home.  This way maybe I'll get more done at work, too!

"Up -n- Under "at the Everyman Theatre
Category: Books, Lit, Drama
"Up -n- Under", a play about an underdog Rugby team taking on the local powerhouse team, is currently playing at the Everyman Theatre in Cheltenham.  I purchased the theatre's 'Everyman Association' membership for 15 pounds recently, and then bought tickets to 4 shows, one of which was this one.  You save 2.50 per show when you join the association, but that jumps to 4.00 per show when you buy 4 at once. 

I decided to make Wednesday nights my 'get out of the flat and get a little culture' night, and so far it's working.  The upside: the theatre has proven 2 for 2 on entertainment.  The downside: Wednesday nights seem to be kid's night. I say this b/c at the last two shows (both of which were on a Wednesday) I've been greeted by 2 to 4 score teens and tweens filling the seats.  For "The Woman in Black" this was more annoying than for "Up -n- Under" where they seemed to be much quieter.  Maybe it was b/c all the normally screaming gals were all google-eyed over the one actor, a man portraying a fireman-by-day, rugby-player-by-night, stripper-in-training.  Whatever the reason, I was thankful.

The show was written 20 years ago by a man who was trying to impress his athletic mates, apparently after watching one too many "Rocky" films.  It's been adapted to a modern age, but still centers around the northern rugby teams, and the split of rugby into league and union teams.  It's made up of 6 actors (5 men, 1 woman) who "play both sides."  No, they're not gay (well, one might be); they just also, in times of need, portray the "bad guys" as well.  I won't go into too much detail, esp. since I'm told you can even rent this one at the video store, though with a slightly different ending (I'll let you figure that one out).  Basically the play, which is a comedy (and, man, does it deliver in that respect), centers around a down-and-out rugby player and his bet with an old friend, now the captain of an 'unbeatable' team, that he can take any team and kick their arse.  The bet, as we all know, is a hopeless one, especially when his mate picks a squad that a) has never EVER won a match and b) has never even fielded a full team.  However, through the course of the play, he and his new team end up finding a measure of dignity for themselves, and even whoop it up on the other team.

I thought everyone involved did a great job.  The writer did wonderfully in updating the look and feel of the play, going so far as to play up the "Rocky" aspect, even adding some "Rocky-esque" tunes in the background.  The actors were very good with their comedic timing and personalization.  And the audience even got involved (not physically, but emotionally) when we came down to the championship match.  I certainly plan on renting the movie, and I recommend if this show comes near you, go see it.

Twisted Ankles Suck
Current mood: annoyed
Category: Blogging
Well, I did it again (Notice I didn't say 'Oops'): I twisted my ankle.  And I hate it.  I never used to twist my ankle, ever.  I could practically run on the outside of my feet and never worry about a thing, and that's the truth.  I guess it came from racing cross country through a crab apple field growing up.  Nope, I never twisted my ankle... until a few months ago.

I was running with the hash, having a jolly old time, when it happened.  I had run to the start (like I normally do), so I decided to walk the trail.  However, after the beer check I decided to run a bit.  I decided this mainly b/c the hares tried to take the walkers trail on the highway near Iwo Jima and I wanted to be off of it as quickly as possible.  So there I was running through Rosslyn, not a care in the world, when I turned a bit to yell at Tipper and...BAM! It happened.  I stepped on the edge of a very deep pothole and went down... hard.  My ankle never felt this way before and, no, it wasn't in love.

Being a quick healer it felt better after a few days.  Problem is: every now and again, such as this past Wednesday, I twist it again.  Never as bad as the first time, but it seems the instances in which I do it are so minor as to be laughable.  This may be a good point to mention I used to always make fun of my roommate, Katie, about her weak ankles and how she could twist them stepping off the sidewalk (and she has - many times).  She at least had an excuse: she got her weak ankles from surgery, and she was a bit of a clutz (Sorry, Katie, but you know it's true).  I had neither excuse.  But now I'll be running along, look up at some couple coming towards me in the underpass tunnel when...BAM! It'll happen again. 

Not only does it hurt, it also totally ruins the 'cool' vibe I try and exude while running.  I'd say I don't know which is worse, but I've spent my fair share of time looking like a dork, so it's no contest that the pain and anger are far worse.  Thing is I think it would heal if I took some time off running in addition to the little exercises I try to do for it.  But I can't really miss any time in my training schedule to do that.  Maybe after Philly at the end of November I'll take some time off, if it hasn't healed by then.  Of course last time I said something like that I ended up in rehab for my back.  Seems these past two years I've been forced to put up with something during my training, something to get in the way of my bid for Boston.  Oh well, guess I'm just getting old.  Hell, even my dog's come up lame.  I miss you, Ozzy.

The Cotswold Way?
Current mood: accomplished
Category: Sports
I don't think so.  If it was there'd be alot more thin people around.  Come to think of it, other than a lot of beer guts, most people are kinda thin around here, in spite of the fact of all the fried foods around.  Maybe the Cotswold way is indeed the way.  So what is the Cotswold Way?  Nothing so exciting really.  However, paired with the Gloucestershire Way, the two make up an impressive array of footpaths in the area, all relatively free from traffic. 

My coworker turned me on to the Cotwold Way (man, sounds like Amway or something).  He recommended I pick up a Explorer Map of the area and start running on the trails in the area.  I, innocently enough, complied.  It wasn't until I started my 23-miler that I realized just how gruelling this run would be.  I thought Cleeve Hill was a monster.  Well, on the last long run I only really climbed Cleeve Hill twice.  On this run I discovered the other 2 hills that surround Cheltenham: Leckhampton Hill and Crickley Hill.  Together the three hills sort of form a backwards "C" around the town.  Good information...now.

So I started running south out of town on Bath Road and continued on Leckhampton Road.  Now I knew from my commute that this was a good sized hill to get to the car park which led to the trail, but I didn't realize that the hill kept going, and it was on rocky, uneven, dark terrain (tree cover).  But I kept on, eventually making the summit of Leckhampton Hill, the first time.  Now I was about 3 miles into my run, leaving only 20 to go, and I was already feeling it.

I cut right on the trail and made my way down the side of Leckhampton Hill thinking the worst was over.  Wrong.  A few miles later I came to Crickley Hill, site of an old Roman fort apparently.  And I made my way up that one, too, again for the first time.  The view from the top was fantastic, and this one had parking, so you can find it later and take photos.  I'd recommend it.  I didn't have time to stick around so I continued down the other side, basically planning on circling Cheltenham and coming back at it on the west side from the Cotswold way.

Now would be a good time to say that I didn't have my map with me.  I didn't think I'd need it.  Now would also be a good time to say that I did need it.  For the most part the trail is fairly well marked, and you can assume that if you don't see a sign, you should continue straight until you do.  For the most part.  On the other side of Crickley Hill I got turned around and ended up back at the top of the hill, for the second time.  I just couldn't seem to get my heading right, so I tried again.  And again I ended up at the top of Crickley Hill, for the third time. 

I was about halfway done my run, so I decided I'd try the other direction on the trail.  So, continuing to dodge the likes of horses, dogs, and old people I headed back to Leckhampton Hill and climbed that, again.  I continued on down the other side of that, feeling quite tired, but happy to be out there.  It really was quite an experience.  Of course, once again, I got a bit off course and ended up crossing paths with the Gloucestershire Way, but I didn't mind, I just kept on. 

About 17 miles in I decided I'd best head back, so, well, I did.  I skirted around the northwest side of Leckhampton Hill and made my way back into town, thankful to be finishing up my run.  I only came in a mile over what I had planned to run, but a bit slower than I wished.  However, considering the amount of hills I ran and the condition of the trails and the fact that I slowed quite a bit to get my bearings, I was quite happy.  I stopped off at the mini-mart next to my flat, and chugged a litre of OJ, a bottle of Sprite, and I bought a loaf of bread (for breakfast that week).  Settling into my couch has never felt better.

The Jacket
Category: Movies and Television
So I rented "the Jacket" today.  After my run I tried to watch it on my computer, which has been serving as my DVD player while I'm over here.  I just run it through the television and I'm set.  Well, I was set, until I discovered you can only change the region settings on your player only 5 times.  After that, you're stuck with whatever setting it was on.  Luckily for me (in the long run) mine is now stuck on US movies.  So I had to run down to the store and buy a DVD player.  They're like a dime a dozen over here so it only set me back 25 pounds.  Anyway, that's what I watched the movie on.

"The Jacket" came out this year and starred Adrien Brody as Jack Starks, Keira Knightley as Jackie Price, Kris Kristofferson as Dr. Becker, and Jennifer Jason Leigh as Dr. Lorenson, and many others.  It was a very well-done movie, set both in 1991 after the first Gulf war, and in 2007.  Jack is injured during the Gulf War and suffers from some form of amnesia.  He's sent home where he ends up taking the fall for a crime he didn't commmit and cannot remember.  He's placed in a mental institution, certain of his innocence, but forced to endure Dr. Becker's radical treatments, which consist of some drugs and a morgue drawer.  In the drawer, Jack is transported to the future where he discovers he's going to die in a few days.  It's up to him and Jackie to try and find out how and stop it from happening.  The movie switches between time lines and comes to a pretty cool ending, and somewhat happy at that.

I thought the movie was very good, especially when you start to wonder if any of it ever really happened.  Think about it after you see it.  It's somewhat trippy.  All the actors played very well off of each other and you really got the sense that these were real people with real problems.  It's good when you can get into a movie to the point that you forget it's not real.  Suspension of disbelief is a hard thing to come by, and I was able to put aside the impossibility of what I was seeing and just enjoy the movie.  I'd recommend it to anywone.  Go rent it. 

Day Trippin'
Category: Travel
Just got back from a little "day trip" around the Cotswolds.  I woke up and was out the door by 9, and back by 4.  Not bad for hitting 3 quick stops: Tewkesbury Abbey, Broadway Tower, and Bourton-on-the-Water.  Of the three, Bourton-on-the-Water, and maybe the town of Tewkesbury, could warrant spending an entire day there.  Broadway tower does, however, offer some great trails to walk and run on, and a nice area to picnic.

Visiting a church on a Sunday I was forced to squeeze time inside the abbey b/w services, so I didn't get to see too much of the inside, but I saw enough.  The abbey recently celebrated it's 900th birthday.  Wrap your mellon around that one.  Wow.  Inside there were beautiful stained glass windows, which, by the way, are a pain in the ass to photograph.  The other impressive thing about the inside was that the huge columns and spired archways were built completely without mortar.  They're comprised of tight-fitting stones held together by only their own weight.  Impressive.  The outside was beautiful, too, especially these eerie stone faces adorning the archway of one of the entrances.  They looked almost real, like you took some clergymen and dipped them in stone and shoved them in the wall.  Creepy.  If you want to spend more time in the area I suppose you could visit the town shops and maybe take a walk down to the river Avon.  I, however, got in the car and drove to my next stop: Broadway Tower.

Broadway Tower, near the town of Broadway (clever) is this medieval-looking tower sitting on top of a massive hill.  You are able to see 13 or so counties on a good day.  The tower itself was actually built in 1800 as a folly.  Follies were very popular back then and as I understand it were nothing more really than designing a building and it's surroundings to mimic medieval times.  Still, it was impressive.  For someone who doesn't like to read displays too much when travelling, the inside wasn't really that impressive.  The view, however, was worth the entrance fee.  Very nice.  As was confirmed by a group of young cross-country girls and their coaches, the area also makes a good location for running hills.  Showing up around 10AM like I did and spending some time walking around was a good way to do it if you'd like to grab some food for lunch at the restaurant that sits just below the tower.  Again, however, I jumped in the car for my last stop: Bourton-on-the-Water.

Bourton-on-the-Water, or "the Venice of the Cotswolds," as they like to call it, is a nice little shopping town, if you like that kind of thing.  There's a waterway running through the town (it's only 8 inches deep, though), so you meander your way over these bridges to see the different parts of town.  I liked it.  I was there to see their two most famous attractions: the Birdlands, and the Model Village.  The town hosts a model of the village itself, set to one-ninth scale.  That in and of itself is impressive, however, what is even more cool is that model has a model in it (that's something like 1:81 scale, right?).  And that model has a model (1:729).  And finally, that model has a model, for a whopping scale of 1:6561.  I'm sure, other than the math, many would be impressed by this model village.  I, however, wasn't really impressed, and just did it to say I did it.  After that the plan was to see the Birdlands, home to the only penguins in all of England, or some other rubbish like that.  But today I wasn't really in the mood for watching fowl, so I went to the maze next to the zoo.  It was a hedge maze that, in addition to finding your way to the center, had clues along the way so you could solve the puzzle of the dragonfly's resting place when you got there.  It was a good half hour spent and left me feeling good about my skills.  Though, whomever might know that a picture of a fish, that sort of looked like a flounder, was actually a fish called a Plaice, must spend too much time reading up on ichthyology.  Loser.  Well, once again I made my way back to the car, after an ice cream cone, but this time my destination was simply home.  I wonder what I'll do for my next day trip.

“The Machinist”
Category: Movies and Television
First off, let me start by saying I didn't mean to do a Jennifer Jason Leigh weekend.  I might as well have rented "Backdraft" while I was at it.  Though this weekend she went from doctor to hooker.  Oh how the mighty have fallen.  Regardless she did a wonderful job in both movies.  And both movies, though different, were good in their own right.  I much preferred "the Jacket" though.  Although maybe that's because tonight I just couldn't seem to keep my mind on just one thing, and "the Machinist" seemed to require just that, so much so that I went online and looked up "the Machinist spoiler" just so I'd know how the movie went in case I shut it off.  Did you know that the real title is "el Maquinista" instead?  Who'd have thought?

The movie is trippy on so many levels: the storyline (a factory worker can't sleep and starts to doubt his own sanity, esp. after he gets a coworkers arm ripped off), the actor (Christian Bale looked strictly skeletal at 6'2" 121 pounds), and the presentation (the dark, somber mood lighting with splashes of color).  All three of these things come together to make for one interesting movie.

I wouldn't recommend this for everyone, especially those of you with a proclivity towards ADD.  It requires your full attention to truly appreciate the movie and all of it's clues and twists (at least, this is what I read).  But if you liked "Memento" or "Sixth Sense" or even "Fight Club" then you'll probably like this one, too.  Good luck.  By the way, after watching Christian Bale in this movie I felt the need (which I satisfied) to go out and eat a KitKat bar.  Oh how the Brits love their KitKat bars...

London Impressions - Take 3
Category: Travel
I've been to London three times now since I've been here: once for a night, once for my Birthday weekend, and once for touring.  Below I'll tell you what I saw, and what I thought after my third trip.

London.  Everybody dreams of visiting London.  And everybody that’s been there apparently loves it…if you can afford it.  If you consider the fact that London is already outrageously expensive, add in the fact that our current exchange rate is nearly 2:1, and factor in that most late-night bars now have to charge a cover to stay open late, well you’ve got one expensive, but fun, city.  
 
I’ve been to London a few times since I’ve been here, and plan on going a few more.  In fact, I’ll be there Thursday night so I can fly out Friday morning.  It helps that I’ve got a friend there.  This way I get the insider’s scoop, and a free place to crash.  If you can score that, do it.  So, I guess I should tell you everything I’ve done since I’ve been to London.  Okay, over the next few paragraphs I’ll do just that.  Any future installments may build on things I have yet to see.
 
First off, how does one get in and out of London from Cheltenham?  Well, we’ll start by saying, “Don’t Drive!” Aside from the congestion fee (apparently once you get within London you have to pay to drive around), the driving is fierce and the streets are confusing (the city isn’t set on a grid system like in the states).  So leave you’re car at home and bus or train.  The bus is cheapest; http://www.megabus.com leaves 2x per day from the Promenade and goes into Victoria Station.  The cost is only like 10 pounds each way, maybe more if you book a return trip at the same time.  It takes about 3 to 3.5 hours door to door, so it’s not too bad.  The train is more flexible, but more expensive, by about a factor of 3.  Trains leave all the time from Cheltenham Spa and go into Paddington Station, some with no stops along the way.  If there is a stop, however, be warned that it can sometimes get confusing.  Best bet is to just get off the train and ask the conductors that hang about the platforms.  Total trip is anywhere from 2 hours on up.  If you have the time, and not the cash, take the bus.  
 
Once you’re there, there’s so much to do.  I’ll just tell you about some of the things I’ve done so far: riding the tube, taking a taxi, Regent’s Park, Covent Garden, Piccadilly Circus, some sort of Goth shopping fair, riding a double-decker bus, Yo! Sushi, the night life, the London Eye, Westminster Abbey, Buckingham Palace, the changing of the guard, filming of the DaVinci Code, Cleopatra’s Needle, the Tower of London, the Tower Bridge, Big Ben and Parliament, and the London Dungeon.  I think that’s about it.
 
Riding the tube is easy, once you get the hang of the different lines.  Grab a tube map and you’ll be fine.  Be aware that on any given day, any number of the lines, or stops, may be out of service; read the signs and listen for the announcements.  If you’re going to be there for a bit, consider grabbing a 1-day, or even a 3-day pass.  At 2 pounds a ride, you’ll tear through money pretty quick.  Plus the passes get you on the busses free, and are still cheaper than taxis.  Though I must admit, taking a taxi shows you how good these guys are at maneuvering their cabs within inches of obstacles and they’ll impress you with their knowledge of the city.  The bus is great, too, especially when you sit up on the top level at the front.  It helps even more if you’ve had a few drinks.  Wicked fun.
 
Take a walk around Regent’s Park, or Hyde Park, or any number of the seven or so they have scattered about London.  You’ll see, hear, smell, and possibly taste quite a bit.  Plus it’s good exercise.  On your walk around the parks head over to Covent Garden or Piccadilly Circus for some shopping.  Or, better yet, on a Saturday find the goth fair.  Man that’s a sight.
 
After that, consider the London Eye, Buckingham Palace, the Tower of London, the Tower Bridge, Big Ben and Parliament, Westminster Abbey, for a packed day (or better yet, two) of sight-seeing.  Avoid the London Dungeon.  I repeat, avoid the London Dungeon; it’s overpriced and nothing more than a carnival tour and ride.  Really just a bunch of scenes ‘acted’ out by the employees.  Not worth the price.  The London Eye is also a bit pricey, but fun to do at least once; you can see so much of the city from this giant, slow-moving, ferris wheel.  Plus you can sit down.  Nearby is the aquarium and Dali museum if you’re interested, as well as a ton of street performers.  Buckingham Palace is beautiful, especially if you can get a tour, which they do in the late summer and early fall.  Get there early if you want to see the changing of the guards, though.  Man it gets crowded.   Tower Bridge and the Tower of London are fun as well.  The Tower of London has guided tours available, but we just paid the extra money and took the audio tour.  It served just as well and I could move at my own pace.  More importantly I could ignore the stuff I had no interest in.  Big Ben, which is really the name of just the bell, sits next to Parliament and is a must see, especially if you’re a fan of National Lampoon’s European Vacation.  After that head over to take a tour of Westminster Abbey; the place is gorgeous.  If you’re lucky you’ll even come out and be treated to a film crew doing a scene from the up-coming DaVinci Code, featuring Tom Hanks, Ian McKellan, and Jean Reno, directed by Ron Howard.  That was fun to watch.  We stumbled upon Cleopatra’s Needle on our walk back towards the flat.  Wasn’t really much to it.  On your walks, it’s also easy to take in your own pseudo pub crawl and just stop by a bunch of pubs and sample the beer, or a Pim’s.  In some ways it’s better than going out at night b/c each pub at night tends to charge a cover, so you’re sort of forced to pick just one (or spend a fortune).  This way you see a bunch of different pubs, and no cover.  I will say this though, in parting: since all the shops close early in England, and all the pubs stay open, the nightlife here is something to experience.  It can be a lot of fun, and very tiring.  
 
I hope you do get a chance to visit London.  It’s quite an experience and I still have a few more things on my list to hit, like the whisper room at St. Paul’s Cathedral, a ride on the river Thames, and a few more things in my guidebooks, like a play.  I’ll write more on those when I finally get to do them.  

How the Brits Differ - Running Commentary
Category: Travel
Things I've learned about the British:
Food:  For starters, where are the damn pretzels?  For the life of me I haven't seen any pretzels, and I mean the hard ones, for sale anywhere.  And I love pretzels.  Somebody please fill me in on this one.  Peanut butter is more, well, natural over here.  I could get used to this one.  It doesn't seem as processed, and makes for a tasty snack inside my sandwich maker.  Mmmm, hot peanut butter sandwiches for breakfast.  Speaking of breakfast, chocolate milk is thicker over here.  Much thicker.  Like milkshake thicker.  In fact they even call it a milkshake.  I find it's really good when you cut it in half, or even a third, with 'semi-skimmed' milk, which is 2 percent, like we have.  Every vegetable and fruit is labeled with the country of origin.  Food-bourne disease is no laughing matter to these guys.  It is cool to be able to see where all your vegetables come from.  My salad is apparently a member of the UN.  Some show over here was trying to teach people to cut down on the air miles their food was accumulating, making for a 'greener' shopping experience, but a much sadder vegetable (no trip to Pago Pago).  Tap vs. Still vs. Bubbly.  If you don't specify tap water, you get bottled water, and if you don't specify still bottled water, you get bubbly (carbonated) water.  Yuck.  Beer is warmer over here.  And better.  But you can get cold Guinness.  Weird.  Shrimp are called prawns.  Does that mean when I was growing up I'd have been called a prawn?  Sometimes in a restaurant, when you order fish, you get the WHOLE fish.  I don't like my food watching me eat it.  Brits love their sweets, but they call them biscuits. I guess it makes them feel healthier.  And everything is called tea, even the coffee.  Sweets, coffee, and cigarettes (EVERYONE smokes); no wonder people say Brits have bad teeth.  This, however, is not entirely true, but it is true enough to support the saying.  Fish and chips are gooooooood.  Mushy peas aren't.

Driving:  For the obvious starters, you drive on the other side (the 'proper side' they call it.  Kooks).  You drive from the other side of the car, too.  Rent an automatic; you'll thank me.  There are no stop signs over here.  Take a lesson in round-a-bouts, or you'll be going round about one all day long trying to find your way out.  Yield to the right.  Yield to the right.  I know I said it twice, but their whole damn way of life seems to depend on it.  Don't try to figure out the radios.  Or the washers.  I know that's not about driving, but I still can't figure mine out.  Turn signals are very important over here.  Use them.  Signs are very important over here.  Look at them.  Road maps are a necessity.  Driving in England is easy, as long as you know where you are going. 

Vocabulary:  crack on, nick off, brilliant, lovely, love, nappy, bell them, knackered, cheers, etc.  I'll add and explain these later.

Lifestyle: Get your shopping done during the day; most shops close at 5:30.  After that you only really have the pub (or the movies) to go to, and they won't sell you toothpaste.  Cell phones are your lifeline over here, and everybody loves to text you.  However, they still haven't learned how to shut off the key beep, making for annoying train and tube rides at times (imagine someone writing a letter and every time they typed a word it beeped).  Don't tip.  Unless you want to.  And sometimes not even then.  Just be polite.  British men, take a memo: wash your hands before leaving the restroom.  Also, there is no need for capri pants.  British women, take a memo: if you're wearing jeans there is no need for a skirt.  British fashion, take a memo: the 80's are over.  British listen to 80's, 90's, and today's music, both ours AND theirs (which is rank).  So sometimes you feel like you're back at the school dance trying to ask Becky Carmichael out, praying that you don't have Juju B's stuck in your teeth.  Pay attention: while driving, each pedestrian hit puts a Brit one step closer to heaven. 

That's it for now. 

“Framed” at the Everyman
Category: Books, Lit, Drama
Well, the Everyman Theatre is three for three with this week’s production of “Framed,” a classic thriller.  Seeing these shows in such a old town atmosphere probably helps, as does the fact that these are traveling shows.  The way I figure it, and I’m by no means an expert (not even close) is that these productions that travel through towns, performing a week at a time, have better, more suitable actors to the roles.  A local production can only really house local talent, whereas a traveling show, under a bigger production company, has broader range.
 
The play itself was a classic thriller.  You know the type.  Suspenseful, trust no-one, end with a twist, let’s wrap everything up in a nice little box with a bow type shows.  Some of you like those.  You know who you are.  Anyway, the play centers around 5 characters who come together over the course of the play in a remote cottage in Norfolk.  How convenient that there’s no cell phone coverage.  And no one around.  And the house is haunted.  
 
Spoiler… So here’s the short of it: girl meets boy through the internet and travels away with him at the behest of her best friend to her best friend’s cottage no less.  Girl’s been burned before (found out her now ex-husband) was a drug dealer.  Odd how the ex-husband dated her best friend before her, isn’t it.  Anyway, boy and girl arrive at “haunted” cottage.  Apparently a man was killed there some years back.  A man whom boy apparently knew.  How odd.  Boy apparently seems to know his way around the house.  Boy gets in argument with the groundskeeper, who is eerie and carries a gun.  Girl distrusts boy.  Boy and girl fight.  Girl’s best friend shows up.  All three go to dinner.  Who is that coming down from the attic?  Return from dinner.  Oh no, let’s send boy back for best friend’s purse.  Who was that man?  It’s girl’s ex-husband, and he’s with girl’s best friend!  Oh no!  It’s a set up, and the groundskeeper is in on it!  They’re going to kill my boy!  And me!  Gasp!  Groundskeeper is a double agent?  Boy saves the day!  Good thing boy was a customs agent.  I love you.  Smooch.  I love you!  Smooch.  Applause.
 
Okay, I jest.  But in all seriousness it was a great play.  I think I like plays, maybe not musicals, as much as I like movies.  You’re forced to use your imagination more.  Oh, and that little intermission is great for me.  I can run around.  And play.  With ice cream.

“Mr. and Mrs. Smith”
Category: Movies and Television
Great movie.  It helps that Angelina Jolie is in it.  And Brad Pitt for you girls.  But I wasn’t really watching him.  Okay, maybe a bit.  You have to admit he gets kick-ass roles.  Who wouldn’t want his job?  Who wouldn’t want to sleep with Angelina Jolie.  And Jennifer Aniston.  You know you want it.
 
So Mr. And Mrs. Smith are attending marriage counseling.  Seems their marriage has become only so-so.  They just don’t seem to share enough anymore.  After meeting in Bogota, Columbia, during a search for a assassin, Brad and Angelina… I mean “Jon” and “Jane” fall in love and get married.  But are they really who they say they are?  Of course not!  They’re both assassins for competing firms, and they’ve both been assigned a very important job: to kill each other.  Only they don’t know that, yet.  But when they do, they go through the whole “I can’t believe it” routine and, eventually (of course), come to realize they still love each other, now that everything is out in the open.  Except for all the lies of course.  Unfortunately, now there’s a hit out on each of them and they need to find a way to get out of the whole mess alive, and together.
 
There were tons of great action sequences, and the stunts were top-notch.  I have to admit that Brad and Angelina do seem to work very well together.  And what better formula is there?  Take World’s hottest man and team him up with World’s hottest woman.  Then blow shit up.  Nice.  Anyway, the sequences where they sort of “relive” their marriage together, trying to clear up the lies, are hilarious, especially considering they’re usually in the middle of a firefight or car chase at the time.  I’d recommend this movie.  In fact, I’ll probably buy it, again if only for the fact that she’s in it.  And she’s yummy.  Though lately she seems to be losing a ton of weight.  Poor lass.  

“Kung Fu Hustle”
Category: Movies and Television
Okay, is “Kung Fu Hustle” a comedy?  It was touted as one, but I just didn’t see it.  Maybe there were a few parts that were snicker funny.  Maybe it was the subtitles.  Maybe it was the subtitles and my ADD.  Whatever it was, I was visually impressed with this movie, but couldn’t really tell if there was a story.
 
Let’s see, take one part bad guy gang.  Throw in one part poor village defending themselves.  Toss in a couple kung fu masters.  And stir in a good guy gone bad.  Mix them all up with some so-so special effects and well-choreographed fight scenes, and you have this movie.  
 
Apparently this good guy gone bad is destined for something great.  But let’s save that for the last five minutes of the movie.  We can fill the rest of the movie with stunning fight scenes and maybe nobody will notice that there’s not really any significant plot or character development.  Especially if we throw in a bunch of bad guys.  With axes.  The movie was mildly entertaining, especially when you consider I had nothing better to do on the flight back to the US (I was going home for the DC Red Dress Run, but more on that later).  I like kung fu movies and all, and this was certainly that.  If you don’t expect anything else then you may be okay.  Problem was it goes back to this being a “comedy.”  I chose to watch this over Will Ferrell in “Kicking and Screaming” because it said this was a “can’t miss comedy.”  Apparently you can miss the comedy, by a long shot.  Maybe I’d have liked it more had I not been mislead.  It’s okay, I still get to watch “Kicking and Screaming.”
“Kicking and Screaming”
Category: Movies and Television
Three movies in one sitting.  What am I?  Crazy?  No, actually I’m just sitting on a flight back to the United States.  Moving on.  Will Ferrell.  Seems this guy isn’t really good headlining his own movie.  Sure he was great in Old School, and other movies.  But I didn’t like “Anchorman.”  And I didn’t entirely enjoy “Kicking and Screaming” either.  Maybe I’ll need to watch “Bewitched.”  Third time is a charm, right?  Don’t get me wrong: the movie was okay, just not one of the best I’ve ever seen.  Mike Ditka did a pretty good job, though.  Of course he really was just playing himself, the coach.
 
So, the movie is a typical one: Will plays the son to Robert Duvall, who does an excellent job, by the way.  Mike Ditka fills the role of the rivalrous neighbor.  Will has constantly lived in his father’s shadow, even having been upstaged when both he and his father had a child on the same day.  Imagine having an uncle your age.  Or a brother the same age as your son.  Come to think of it, I think I know someone in a similar situation.  Imagine your dad always one-upping you, on purpous.  Imagine a son forced to ride the bench on grandpa's championship soccer team.  Imagine your dad trading your son to the last place team.  Cue "Bad News Bears" music.  Will decides to coach the team, and recruits Ditka to help.  Can Will beat his father AND keep his self-respect and love of his son?  We'll find out.  Can we get enough mileage out of that premise to man a full movie?  Most other movies can, but this one can't, so we're forced to endure the "sane man gets hopped up on coffee routine."  

Go ahead, watch the movie if you have nothing better to do, but don't plan on being totally impressed.  Unless, that is, you loooooove Will Ferrell.  Or Robert Duvall.  Or Mike Ditka.  Or, um, little boys.  Pervert.

Girls don't make passes at guys who wear...Dresses
Category: Parties and Nightlife
Okay, so it doesn't rhyme.  And girls do indeed make passes.  Well, it depends on the guy.  And the dress.  And, no, I'm not talking about me.  Though I did look quite fetching at the D.C. 12th Annual Red Dress Run, or "the Dirty Dozen" as it was known.  Technically I wasn't wearing a dress, but more on that later.

So the premise is this: hashing started in Kuala Lumpur well over a half a century ago (1938 to be exact).  Look it up.  The Red Dress Run, however, began much later, and in San Diego.  I'll give you the short version.  In 1987 a hasher brought a virgin (someone new to hashing.  not someone new to sex) to the run.  She was wearing a red dress.  She had one damn fine adventure.  She continued hashing.  A year later she was invited back to San Diego, from Houston, to attend the first annual Red Dress Run.  Everyone, and I mean everyone, wore a red dress.  Now you can join in a Red Dress Run all over the world, including D.C.  which brings me to my story.

I was supposed to be helping plan the event but, as usual, I was sent away from D.C. on business.  I helped out where I could but all the kudos goes elsewhere.  Imagine 500 people, including myself, converging on Dr. Dremo's in Arlington one Saturday morning.  You have to check them in, provide them beer, and entertain them with activities (mainly drinking) and toys (mainly sarongs and t-shirts this year).  The toys are to remind them where they've been after all the beer.  I was helping check them in, decked out in my red cammo kilt, combat vest, helmet, and combat boots.  Also on hand were my tequilla bandoliers.  Thirty-six shots worth.  I was locked and loaded.  That took several hours, during which I snuck away occassionally to have some beer, snap some photos, and chat up some friends.

Next imagine all 500 of those red dressers converging in the parking lot for some fun and frivolity, before splitting into a runner's group and a walker's group, to make their way into Georgetown, surprising many along the way.  What a blast we had rolling through Georgetown on our way to Third Edition, where we fed them all beer once again, before heading deeper into the city to the Shriner's Temple for the final stop.  Here we were all given food, more drink, and dancing.

Finally imagine keeping all but the starting location a secret from all of those people.  Quite a accomplishment.  Those guys deserve a ton of credit.  To give you another take on how lavish this affair is: the budget is around $35,000 or so.  That's alot of coin.

I was soooo very jet-lagged after showing up the day before from England (though I was dressed and ready to go by 9AM that day b/c of the same reason), so we went to the after party at a friend's house in DC.  That, too, was a good time.  The pork shoulder was good, too.  Alas, it had to end.  You can only keep 500 people in red dresses so long, and this one was going down for the count.  I called it a night and headed for home.  Until next year...

“Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell”
Category: Books, Lit, Drama
What if Napoleon were defeated, not by combat alone, but by the resurgence of magic in England?  Two magicians, two ideologies, one ending.  And one long book, somewhat worth the read. 

I won't bore you by giving you a history of Susanna Clark (which I don't know) or a blow by blow commentary (which you won't care).  Basically, England in the 1800's is abound with "theoretical" magicians, those magicians that only study magic using the works of past magicians and other books.  There are no "practical" magicians, those that actually perform magic.  And there won't be, either, if Mr. Norrell has his way.  He's spent his life studying, and practicing, magic, all the while buying up all books on, and of, magic.  He has also found ways to put many theoretical magicians out of the picture.  His goals of bringing magic back to England under his explicit care are almost complete, until Jonathan Strange comes along, another magician with a whole new view on magic.  Far from being upset, Mr. Norrell welcomes Strange as a student.  Unfortunately, the seeds of discontent begin to grow.  Strange's views, and Norrell's secrets, begin to drive the two apart.  Meanwhile the man with the thistle-down hair (in reality a faery) stirs up trouble around England.  Nobody knows what is going on except for the blue-tatooed fraudulent magician.  He seems to know everything...

Well, everything makes sense in the end.  Though, to be honest, I'm not a huge fan of books that take 700 pages to build the story, then wrap it up in 75.  This one was no exception, but the concept and principal of the book was enough to keep me going.  If I can get through the unabridged version of "The Count of Monte Cristo" I can get through this, right?  And I did.  And I was glad for it.  I like the way it ended.  Unfortunately there were great concepts, like travelling through mirrors, that weren't given proper time.  Anyway, if you've got 780 pages to spare feel free to pick up a copy of this book.  Better yet, go to the library; it's cheaper.  Just don't expect to be blown away. 

Curse of the Where Pretzel
Current mood: amused
After 8 weeks of searching the pretzel has finally been found.  Sort of.  I discovered a pack of them today hanging out at the Tesco Metro.  They were hiding amongst the crisps (chips to many of you) and tortillas, many of them having gone so far as to cover themselves in a Dorito-like dusting of cheese.  The plain ones were virtually nowhere in site.  Maybe they're like a naked M&M to these people (that's just not proper, I say).  The plain ones were hiding in a pack of "Pretzels and Breadstick Selection" which I snatched up.  For detective purposes only of course.

I tried interrogating several of them using the techniques found at http://www.transbuddha.com/mediaHolder.php?id=937 but to no avail.  Masochistic little freaks.  You'd think living in a country that hates them they'd welcome me with open arms.  Not so.  I feel like a crack addict when I go grocery shopping now.  But at least it's cured me of my addiction.  The occassional fix here and there seems to do me just fine.  And I'm taking sadistic pleasure in eating these little bastards I DID find.  Which should send a good message to the others out there.  Since they like that freaky deaky shit.

And so the search continues, much like seeking out terrorist sleeper cells.  Except without all the danger.  Or excitement.  Or public safety concerns.  Okay, it's nothing like it.  But I do it anyway.  Why?  Because it's my job, damnit.  Okay, it's not my job.  And I don't get paid for it.  Come to think about it, it's not really that fun either.  Why then?  Just as there can be no light without darkness, no good without evil, no Captain without Tennille, there can be no pretzel without me.  And I owe those little guys that.  Yeah, at least that...

"Assault on Precinct 13"
Current mood: disappointed
Category: Movies and Television
Low light = low budget?  Damn, what a dark movie.  And I don't mean dark as in dark comedy ala "Cable Guy" or dark as in just plain dark ala natural lighting in "The 13th Warrior."  I mean dark as in "let's make it so dark you have trouble telling who is who."  I mean so dark as in "I'll make you spend so much time squinting you'll forget I based this entire movie on a tired old weak-ass premise."  Who's good?  Who's bad?  Michael Jackson was bad.  And so was this movie.  If our dashing Lawrence Fishburne had appeared in my flat and offered me the blue pill to make the story end I'd have taken it, and Keanu would still be considered one of Hollywood's worst.

Okay, so what makes the movie?  Ethan Hawk is a burned out undercover cop hiding behind a desk, which is made of wood.  Not the same as the wood in his pants that he has for his shrink, who gets roped into the story.  Little Larry is a gangster, recently captured, who everyone wants, including corrupt cop, Gabriel Burne.  New Year's eve.  Detroit.  Snow storm.  Precinct 13 is being closed and is down to a skeleton staff, many of whom are to become skeletons themselves.  The bus hauling Bishop (Mr. Fishburne) is forced to stop here for the night.  Enter corrupt cops.  Enter supporting actors John Leguizamo and, um, Ja Rule.  Okay, not too bad, guys.  Enter a few twists to make you go, "didn't really see that coming."  But also enter that feeling in the back of your mind that the movie isn't going to get any better than an average bowel movement.

What happened, guys and gals?  All (some) of you have talent.  Yes, you too, Brian Dennehy.  And you're even in "Death of a Salesman" over here.  I'll tell you what happened: you got roped into another "what's a cop? what's a robber?" movie.  Those movies are good, sometimes.  But only when you truly delve into the psyche of the characters.  Not when you try to shove in tons of firefights.  And definitely not when one character disappoints you in the last scene.  Stay in character boys.  Anyway, skip it.  Across the water.  Like those flat rocks when you were little.  Then come back inside to momma, who's waiting with a big bowl of chili. 

Devil's Chimney
Well, I was going to write 2 entries today, one for my run and one for my take on poetry slamming in the UK.  Unfortunately you can't cut a 24 mile run 2 miles short saying, "I'll save some energy for tonight."  The damage is already done.  And you can't climb something called "Devil's Chimney" without consequence.  The price today was the poetry slam. 

First things first: Devil's Chimney.  In the rain.  And mud.  Without water.  Okay, multiple choice:  Which of the following happened to me today on my run? A) 6 miles in I discovered I lost my water bottle.  B) 2 miles after that, it started raining.  C) I saw a young rider and her horse nearly go down.  D) I (stupidly) tackled Devil's Chimney.  Or E) All of the Above.  For those of you that didn't select "E" we have a lovely parting gift: the home game!  Yes, all of those things happened today.

It's one thing to run 24 miles around here.  It's another to do it without water.  Still can't quite figure out how it came out of my pack.  I'd blame pickpockets, but even they're not that dumb to roam where I was roaming.  But it happened.  I even went and looked for it, but to no avail. 

Luckily I had all the water I needed shortly after.  In the form of rain.  Rain, as you all know, turns dirt to mud.  And rocks to ice.  Not good on the ankle, but I survived.  Though I was soaked to the bone and my map will never be the same.  It was depressing though.

But not as depressing as it could've been cresting that hill and seeing a young rider's horse nearly go down on the slick road.  That was a close one.  I'm glad she was alright. 

I wasn't, however, when I climbed Devil's Chimney.  Why do they call it Devil's Chimney?  I don't know, but if I had to guess, I'd say it's because good ol' Lucifer himself hangs out there and smokes a fatty amusing himself by watching the likes of me.  It's either that, or the fact that it's a huge hill near which is a large, skinny, and tall rock formation resembling a chimney. I like my take on it better.

Anyway, it was a good, if slow, run, that proved I'm still a little sick, or jet-lagged.  Unfortunately around mile 21 the top of my foot started hurting and I decided to cut my run short at 22.  It's the same foot as my bad ankle and I'm wondering if I may be doing some damage to the lil' guy.  No choice there really.  Only 6 or so weeks till Philly and I plan on gutting it out.  Only time will tell really.

So I finished my run and drank my usual quart of OJ.  Man I love OJ.  Not the man, the juice.  The man can lick my balls.  The juice, however, can nuzzle up to me under a acorn tree anytime.  After that I soaked in the tub and planned my evening.  Or lack thereof looking back on it.  The goal was to have a big steak, then hit the poetry slam.  It's the Cheltenham Literature Festival this week, and many of you will be disappointed to read that I passed up Maya Angelou and Alice Walker for my run.  Hell, I never read their books anyway. 

The steak gave way to sushi, which was easier on my stomach.  And I discovered the hand roll.  All the tasty goodness of sushi wrapped up and seawead and edible without chopsticks.  Yum.  After the meal, and the John Smith (beer), I was too tired to go to the poetry slam.  And here I am.  I'm going to watch a movie instead.  Not "Assault on Precinct 13" though. 

Before I do, though, I'll urge you to attend a poetry slam next chance you get.  It's a blend of live-performance poetry blended with a mix of almost rap.  It's true performance art.  And it's often funny and inspiring.  Imagine someone telling a story, with rhythm, and rhyme, to an audience, and you have poetry slamming.  Anything from comedy to drama to action can be portrayed up there.  And rarely does it suck.  Even when it does you only have to ask yourself, "Do I have the balls to stand up there and do that?"  If the answer to that is truly, and honestly, "no" then shut the fuck up and enjoy yourself.  Have another beer, or latte, whatever your poison.  They're both usually on hand.  After you're done, go home and write something.  Feel inspired, sort of like you did after the pool scene from "Fast Times at Ridgemont High."
"Guess Who?"
You gotta love those days where you're so beat from the day before that you barely do anything at all.  I slept in, except for the kids outside the kebab house at 2AM, and lounged around some more.  Shopping online can be dangerous on a Sunday morning.  I got away with only buying some books and those new Clif Gel Bloks;  apparently they're like gummy bears for endurance running.  We'll see.  Anyway, then I walked to town center and did a little window shopping, trying to replace the water bottle I lost yesterday but the running store was closed.  Then I waffled between fast food, sushi, chinese, chicken, and bar food.  Bar food won out and I had fish n chips and a side salad.  Finally, we come to the part of the blog that's in the title. I picked up Tom Jane in "Stander" and Ashton Kutcher and Bernie Mac in "Guess Who."

Now I haven't seen the original, starring Sydney Poitier, which was made in 1967, but I read a bit on it before watching this movie.  It also starred Katharine Hepburn and Spencer Tracy as the parents.  I've read that this new one is only loosely based on the original and I'd have to agree, knowing what I know now.  I will mention that in this new version it's a white boy coming home to a black family, and in the original it was a black boy coming home to a white family.  It's not much of a preview but here it is anyway: http://videodetective.com/home.asp?PublishedID=1406.  In both versions it's all about the racial tensions that ensue when, unbeknownst to the family, the daughter brings home a boy of different descent.  That's really all the plot is: girl loves [different race] boy, girl's family is shocked, insert comedy, girl's family comes around, everyone is happy.  That's it.

Okay, on to the review.  This movie got panned apparently.  And I'd love to pan it, too.  But I can't.  Maybe I miss home.  Maybe I want to take a white boy home to meet the family (Hi, mom).  I don't know.  But I enjoyed this movie.  And I don't even really like Ashton Kutcher.  Damn he's annoying.  But you get past that, especially with Bernie Mac.  Sometimes that man is lousy, but in this movie he's pretty damn funny as the distrustful father.  The entire family is given their own individual personalities, right down to the cantankerous grandfather.  That's not to say there was some unnecessary "waiting for the other shoe to drop" material, such as the scene where white boy tells black family some racist jokes.  You just wait for the hammer to fall.  And it does, though I really couldn't tell the difference in the final joke to make it so bad.  Weird. 

Anyway, the reviews say Bernie saves the movie, and I agree.  Rent it.  Enjoy it.  Just don't watch MTV afterwords, least of all "Punk'd."  Well, on to the next movie.  I know, I know.  I need to get a life over here.  Hopefully after the marathons I won't be as tired on Sundays.

"Stander"
Category: Movies and Television
Okay, many of you may know Tom Jane from "The Sweetest Thing" alongside Cameron Diaz, but I know him best from "The Punisher."  Not the old movie with Dolph Lundgren.  I'm talking about the good one.  Well, I wonder if this is the movie that got him the role.  This little-known movie packed a nice punch.  Check out a trailer here: http://videodetective.com/home.asp?publishedid=986072. 

This movie, by the way, is based on a true story.  Ever wonder how close to the real thing a movie has to be to say that?  Like if I wrote a movie about Michael Jackson having sex with Queen Elizabeth, if somewhere in the movie I put in a scene about his court trials, or his messed up nose?  Anyway, in this movie Tom plays a white police captain, Andres Stander, in South Africa during the early 80's.  After killing a man during an apartheid (http://www-cs-students.stanford.edu/~cale/cs201/apartheid.hist.html) riot, he gives up the law for a walk on the wild side.  He robs a bank on his lunch break after telling a man at the station, "a white man could get away with anything today, because we're too busy watching the blacks."  Well, one bank gives way to many, which gives way to some jail time ("uttering" by the way is putting something, usually counterfeit money, into circulation), where he meets the rest of the eventual Stander gang (one played by David O'Hara, who was mad Stephen in "Braveheart").  Ever notice how it's the little things that get you caught?  In this case it was his watch.  Well, he busts out of jail and begins a streak of daring bank robberies, becoming somewhat of the areas anti-hero in the process.

I liked this movie, and I'm glad I finally pulled it down off the Blockbuster shelf after looking at it for nearly two months.  If you can find it, give it a shot, if only for the reason that it gives you a chance to bone up on geography (of Africa) and history (of Apartheid).  And, wow, what a cool conclusion.  Thank you, Tom Jane, for proving to me that some movies are better than a prison shower.  Much better, in fact.  Please pass the soap.

Doubts
Current mood: nervous
Well, today's run was only 5 miles, and once again doubts as to my readiness for Philly arise.  It's not anything in particular to do with this run really, but more a culmination of discoveries made over the past few weeks.

For starters, I looked at the miles logged and times put down for this year versus last year.  This year I'm logging less weekly miles, and slightly slower times.  On the plus side, this year's long runs and tempo runs are the same distance, if not more.  I'm just cutting back my "junk miles."  That shouldn't affect me all that much.  And while last year was run at altitude on trails, it was flat, and this year is run on trails that are very hilly.  All that should indeed combine for slower times.  In many ways I'd expect them to be even slower.

Where the real problem lay is in my recovery time.  It seems like I'm staying tired longer after my speed and long runs.  This bothers me.  Today's run felt okay, but not nearly as good as I thought I'd feel.  Last week was the same.  I guess I can try to combat this in a number of ways: avoid jet lag, eat properly, sleep more, drink (water) more, run slower on my long runs (ugh), or take more time off (double ugh).  Of those things I'll start at the beginning and continue on to the end.  We'll see how it goes.

Okay, all that being said maybe I have nothing to worry about.  We'll really just have to wait and see how this weekend's half race goes, and how the MCM goes.  Those two will really help me judge where I stand for Philly.  Anyway, I guess I just needed to get that off my chest.  I'm a bit nervous, but honestly deep down think I'm ready.  Wish me luck. 

Women BodyBuilders are Icky
Category: Blogging
BBC is airing some special on one woman's path to trying to be Ms. Olympia.  Okay, she walks like a man.  She talks like a man.  She looks like a man in that dress.  I know, I look like a man in a dress, too.  But I am a man!  She isn't.  At least, I don't think she is.

It's not that I'm jealous b/c she's bigger than me, or that she could kick my ass.  Hell, I'd love for a woman to kick my ass around the bedroom.  That could rock.  But she needs to look and act like a woman while doing it.  This woman has the body of a man, the voice of smoker, and the acne of a teenager.  Roids, anyone?  Hell I'll bet she could beat back a mugger with a pecker bigger than most boys'.  Watch out at the gym, she could shower next to you and you'd never know.  But, would you want to? 

Okay, I digress.  I'm not saying all weightlifters take drugs to get ahead.  I'm not even saying most.  I'm not even saying she's taking drugs.  Well, I am, but I'm joking.  Maybe.  I'm just saying some DO take steroids.  But you have that in ALL sports.  And that could lead us down the path of whether atheletes take drugs b/c of atheletes or atheletes take drugs b/c of spectators.  In other words, would a football player take the juice if spectators didn't drive the market price up for a top-of-the-line player into the multi-millions?  Would he still subject himself to that risk if the most anyone could make in the sport were $100,000?  Who knows.  Feel free to comment on that one.  I welcome your opinion.

Anyway, I just think there are some things women shouldn't do if they want to remain women, and this is one of them.  Still, I understand that the sport isn't for everyone, and the women that participate in it aren't either.  And I can respect that, so please don't think I'm bashing women who look like men, or women bodybuilders in general, or even just women who are muscular.  I'm not.  I'm just saying I find it icky.  That's one man's opinion in a sea of billions.  Have at it, she hulks.  Just don't have it my way.  Have it your way.  Burger King still loves ya, baby.

Sad day for cheese lovers
Category: Movies and Television
Three cheers to "Wallace and Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit" for nabbing top spot at the box office from Jodie Foster in "Flight Plan."  Never liked her anyway.  But it was a sad day as well for Aardman Animations Ltd. who created this movie, as well as "Chicken Run."

A fire in nearby Bristol destroyed much of the historical Wallace and Gromit "artifacts."  These 2 loveable claymation characters need their sets and equipment to come to life and now all of that is gone.  Sad that it comes at a time where everyone should be celebrating.  Maybe it's some kind of curse.  Anyway, thought you should know.

The movie: http://entertainment.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,14936-1818836,00.html
The fire: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/10/10/AR2005101000300.html
More on the fire: http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,3604,1589171,00.html

"The Longest Yard"
Category: Movies and Television
"The Longest Yard" is a remake of an old movie that follows the same plot line, apparently.  You know the one: anti-hero gets jailed, gets treated poorly, gets a chance to get revenge on the system through his fellow inmates.  Well, one of the problems with prison movies is you need to be made to forget that these folk are criminals.  You can do that by making them innocent.  But how can you make an entire group innocent?  You can make their crimes understandable (such as certain "heat of the moment" crimes) or possibly petty (such as DUI).  Now I'm not saying DUI is petty.  Let's not go there.  I'm just saying it's petty compared to, say, disemboweling your gardener.  You could also aid the plot by making other inmates so much worse that you forget or, better yet, push that off on the guards.  This movie uses a combination of all of them, but at times it's hard to believe these guys were criminals in the first place.  Maybe that's a good thing.

We'll start by saying that the movie was okay.  Just okay.  It definitely wasn't one of Adam Sandler's best.  I felt like the racial lines it was drawn on were far to obvious.  You know the ones: the fast black boys, the crazy mexican, and the big, dumb, slave boy.  Those lines.  Add to it the stereotypical prison "women," the angry guards, and the corrupt warden and you've got every other movie out there these days.  I will say it was fun watching who I recognized from the supporting cast, such as Goldberg, Stone Cold, Chris Rock, many other SNL guys, Burt Reynolds, Brian Bosworth, and some others.  That was the highlight of my movie experience.  What follows Sandler's imprisonment are typical gags (switching steroids to estrogen), crooked refs, and the like.  There are some good points, but the are few and far between.  All in all, don't pay alot for this movie.  And maybe watch it after a keg or two of beer and you should be great.

6 Kilograms?!
Category: Blogging
What's up with Virgin Atlantic limiting your carry-on luggage to six kilograms?  That's only like 14 pounds.  Hell, most bags weight that.  And I looked into this.  The cargo bins sitting atop the seat each hold between 110 pounds and 180 pounds that I could see.  Considering each of those is only good for 3, maybe 4 bags at best, shouldn't we be allowed at least 25 pounds?  That would make more sense.  If anyone out there has the answer to this I'd love to hear it.  It really sucks to have to check your baggage when you've gone to great (and costly) expense to ensure it's the right size to conform to ALL airline's rules.  Except this one, I guess.

"Kingdom of Heaven"
Category: Movies and Television
Okay, so Orlando Bloom goes from boy, to blacksmith, to criminal, to knight, to lord, to the defender of Jerusalem, and back to blacksmith again, all in the course of 2 hours.  Not bad, buddy. 

The movie is set during the crusades, where Jerusalem is hailed as the "Kingdom of Heaven" and chronicles the fall of said city.  It features Orlando Bloom (not to be confused with Orlando Jones), Jeremy Irons, Liam Neeson, and the brute from "Braveheart."  It's a tale of a newfound father, errant soldiers, a leprous king, and forbidden love.  Let's see how many other things we can squintch into this movie.

All in all, though, the movie was visually stunning.  And I liked the inadvertant slam on most soldiers during the crusades being, um, dense.  I mean, if some blacksmith suddenly comes into the picture and knows more than you on swordfighting, general soldiering, and defensework, what have you been doing with your career?  Time to take up peasantry.  Unfortunately there wasn't much more to this movie than that, which is why I think it didn't last long in the states.  I'd say if you've nothing better to rent, or you looooooove Orlando Bloom, then go for it.  But you won't be blackballed at the water cooler if you haven't seen this one, so don't worry.

"Beyond Boundaries"
Category: Movies and Television
Okay, I just caught the last half of the premier of "Beyond Boundaries" on BBC 2.  I've never been one for reality television but I have to say that this one was quite amazing to watch.  I may just have to tune in again.  I'll keep this short b/c A) I'm tired, B) I've been posting like a whirlwind today, and therefore C) you're probably tired of hearing me or ignoring me altogether.

Anyway, check out this premise: let's drop a bunch of handicapped people in the middle of the jungles of Nicaragua and watch them try and find their way out.  Sounds cruel, no?  Well, maybe that does, but it's not quite THAT dramatic.  But it IS dramatic.  Amongst others you have a deaf man (quite the drama queen), many amputees, 2 wheelchair-bound folk (quite amazing wheelchairs they've got, too), and a blind guy. 

I'll tell you, watching these people overcome the obstacles in their way, which includes temper and emotion, is quite inspiring to watch.  I mean, seeing these folk work together to get everyone across a muddy ravine and you have to look at your own life and wonder why you get so pissy when someone doesn't hold the door open for you.  Hell, after watching this show you could piss in my Kool-Aid and I'd probably forgive you.  But I wouldn't recommend you trying.  For one, your aim's not that good.

It's Raining Men...
Current mood: annoyed
Category: Sports
...Hallelujah.  Right.
So, you’re already worried about how your training is affecting your chances of qualifying for Boston.  You’re worried that you’re not logging enough miles, and not enough fast miles especially.  Then you miss Tuesday’s tempo run b/c of some meeting that runs late, is over an hour’s drive from your flat, and isn’t even necessary.  No worries, you say, you’ll just add those miles in on Wednesday.  In fact, that even works out better.  Until Wednesday’s 2-hour meeting turns into 3 because of some blowhards that don’t even have the courtesy to show up on time.  And you already promised your coworkers you’d head out to watch the England v. Poland football match that night.

So you decide when you get home to do a quick 5, “just to do something, “ you say, before the match.  That’s when the fun starts.  One mile into your run, the rain, which had been absent all day, shows up.  Two miles in, it brings friends.  Lots of them.  While  you’re waiting 10 minutes at a railroad crossing.  For a 3-car train to pass.  In the dark.

After the turnaround, you then have to head through the dark, deserted golf course to get home, all the while worrying that you're going to get mugged.  Ordinarily this isn't much of a worry, but now you're worried b/c it's one thing to get beaten and left for dead on a lovely night.  It's completely another to get beaten, left for dead, AND be uncomfortably wet.

To top it all off, you're soaked, to the bone.  And you've been forced to take off your waterlogged shirt b/c it's so heavy that it's rubbing the scabs off your already chaffed nipples, which you got from Saturday's lovely run in the rain.  Your fingers and toes look like raisins.  Your nuts look like prunes.  Small ones (shrinkage, Jerry!).  Inevitably you're running down the road and some car runs through a puddle and splashes you.  Now, you're already soaked, but this really pisses you off, and you're forced to curse the drivers.  I say drivers (plural) because of course it can't happen just once.  Like they tried it or something.  You know they didn't, but you blame them anyway.  And to all you drivers out there that have ever splashed a pedestrian while driving in the rain: that last line was bullshit; I know you tried it.  Bastards, all of you.