Oh, Tannenbaum, Oh Tannenbaum

I'll write more later, but thank you, Katie, for the wonderful Christmas tree AND the singing, almost-Ozzy dog. And thank you, Kristen, for mailing it. Yes, those are some of your Christmas presents.

Okay, just got back from the pubs and realized I'm going to be missing after this week, sort of like Bob's Big Boy. I know, in some ways he's never really left. He still offers good meals at affordable prices. But I will be gone for a bit on my holiday, unable to deliver my holiday cheer. So here's a bit for you, bundled together and sent with joy to all the good little boys and girls. And if you're naughty, which I hope you are, read on anyway.

What holiday would be complete without Mr. Snow Miser and Mr. Heat Miser? None, that's what! So enjoy this Holiday classic.

And if you're like Mr. Heat Miser, well here's a little number that reminds us all of the joy that comes from stomping on little kid's dreams.

Unsure of what to get your pet this year for Christmas? How about braces? They just might be the thing to go perfectly with that artificial bladder you got them for Thanksgiving.

And what better gift for those (now disheartened) children than the new Barney video, together with 2Pac. Oh, be careful, this isn't work safe. At all. Unless you turn the sound down. And if you do, you won't have a clue why it's funny. So just be patient.

I've got to admit, as much as the videos above stomp on Christmas, I'm so excited. I can't wait to open my gifts but, and this is a rarity, I have no clue what my gifts may be this year, and that is even more exciting. I'm hoping for either World Peace or Charlize Theron's phone number.